Tag Archive | Emotional Health

Being Vulnerable Isn’t The Answer.

While I understand the idea of being vulnerable, something about this way of living doesn’t seem right to me. I don’t want to be vulnerable. Let’s look at the definition of vulnerability:

adjective
1. capable of or susceptible to being wounded or hurt, as by a weapon:

a vulnerable part of the body.
2. open to moral attack, criticism, temptation, etc.:

an argument vulnerable to refutation; He is vulnerable to bribery.
3. (of a place) open to assault; difficult to defend:

a vulnerable bridge.
It basically means being open to attack, criticism and emotional wounds. Now excuse me for a moment but what is so noble about that? I had to take a step back and assess a really well meaning statement from someone but it didn’t sit right with me. I do not follow the crowd or go with what everyone wants to preach nowadays. I conducted a google search, to see if I find any sermons on vulnerability. I did, but I also found psychology articles as well.
The heart is a tender organ. It is also a place where we store our feelings. I keep going back to what Proverbs 4:23 (KJV) : Above all else, guard your heart for out of it flow the issues of life. What are we guarding our hearts from?

Let’s go back to the definition :

  • Moral Attack
  • Criticism
  • Temptation to sin
  • Emotional wounds

When we have a wounded heart, we start living out our wounds. The wounds become sores of bitterness that clouds our judgement and makes it easier for us to sin.

This is why the company we keep is so important. This is why we must deal with the wounds of our hearts from early childhood and continuously in our daily lives.

How does one guard their heart? Great question! This is not something we do in our own power. Time does not heal wounds. Time and complete avoidance also doesn’t protect us. Yes, we must wisely shun temptation and bad influences in every form but for events and circumstances outside of our control, we must have a deep and active relationship with God. We must present our cares, concerns, feelings and wounds to Him. We must be open to Him alone! We must not put our trust in other human beings that have limited knowledge and resources but in the Almighty God who is sovereign: all powerful and all knowing. By the power of His Spirit will He enable us to truly forgive and live freely. In Christ, we have the ability to live godly lives with a PURE HEART. A pure heart is not a wounded one. A wounded heart will eventually seek revenge but a pure heart seeks God. A pure heart accepts God for who He is : A strong tower, a place of refuge and safety.

I learned that the best thing to do is to run to God first. In many cases, God was the only one I could run to. No one understood what I was going through, others didn’t care, and honestly, no one can fix me.

No one can fix us. No one can heal us. No one can deliver us. No one can protect us but God alone. Yes, God sends people into our lives to minister to us but we must always put people in their proper place, giving praise to God alone and allowing it to point back to Him. Anyone or anything that tries to override God’s place in your life is a false god.

Guard your heart, be wise and trust God.

I will Enter Your Rest

The Sabbath day was created for us as a way to slow down and relax after work. God did just that. He showed us how to live through example. All work but no rest causes build up of stress and negative emotions that can lead to illness. I know this from experience.

 

Even simply worrying over things can build stress. Honoring the Sabbath is more than just physical rest but also mental and emotional rest. Jesus is the ultimate source of rest. I find that through prayer, thanksgiving (gratefulness/thankfulness) and being content with who we are,where we are and who God is we find complete peace.

I had a dream that I will never forget. In that dream I was asked why I wasn’t dead but since I’m alive I should rest. REST.

Over and over God has reminded me how important it was for me to rest. I want everything done now; I must do it myself because only I can do it best and my self worth was tied into performance. If I didn’t get everything done at a set time I was worthless and a failure. I also took on other people’s problems in excess. I love helping others and expressing concern but constant whining and negativity left me drained. I always say, a person will accept help when they want change. I cannot fix anyone and so I don’t need to sit around being everyone’s therapist.

I have slowly implemented ways to reduce physical stress through OCCASIONAL exercise, and breathing techniques, avoiding stressful food and environments. Mentally changing the way I see things and allowing myself time to rationalize my feelings and finding ways around situations. No more running away but no more worrying either. Worrying is another way to saying to God ” I don’t trust in you”. It’s ok to have concerns but that’s why the bible tells us to go to God in prayer about everything.

When I’m tired I will rest. Everyday make time to rest and talk to God. Simply do nothing. Lay still; at home or even in the sun. Have ONE DAY where you don’t cook anything, use electronics, talk to anyone unless for emergencies. Solitude is important. I always say that if a person cannot be alone with themselves, they have an issue.

Embrace a lifestyle that is not acceptable by Western Society. There was one thing I looked forward to growing up and it was having freedom. To me, being a adult not only meant having responsibilities but the freedom to create a life that makes you happy. You can choose exactly how you spend your time. I feel that money has become a burden more than a source of comfort and we spend our time living for status and wealth we never enjoy. The bible also talks about this in Ecclesiastes. There is a time for everything under the sun and what is the point in working hard but not enjoying the fruits of your labor?

Money should work for you, not the other way around. Remember, you are the goal and everything else is the means. You are the end to every goal knowing that by the grace of God every need will be met. I personally don’t think God wanted us to suffer for the natural things in life which is why Jesus told us not to worry about food or clothes like the heathens do.

Exodus is another book that displays the graciousness of God, supplying all that the Israelite needed to get through a very rough time in their history. God gave them the 10 commandants as a way to live in harmony with each other and to have peace of mind within. It is for our benefit that God gave us such rules. It was never meant to keep us from experiencing freedom but actually gives us complete freedom.

I choose from today to honor the Sabbath.